Hey there, mama! Today’s post focuses on the factors that cause burnout at work. You’ll learn exactly how and why you’re disproportionately at risk as a mom, and then you’ll learn 6 powerful ways to help working moms overcome burnout.
Burnout isn’t just about feeling tired, it’s complete physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion. And let’s be honest: as a working mom, burnout hits differently.
The size and scale of the problem for working moms to overcome burnout
It’s no secret that working moms are at a higher risk of burnout, and the stats back it up. First, 86% of working moms report feeling exhausted by balancing work and family responsibilities (according to a study by Motherly in 2021). If that wasn’t enough, research from the Institute for Women’s Policy Research found that working mothers are 28% more likely to experience burnout compared to fathers. And get this—according to a report by McKinsey & LeanIn.org, one in three working moms is considering downshifting her career or leaving the workforce altogether due to burnout (click here to read more). When you’re carrying the mental load of both work and home, it’s no wonder the burnout rate is through the roof!
In two previous posts, you learned about the six work factors that can cause burnout. If you haven’t already familiarised yourself with these six work factors, please click here to read part one, and here to read part two. Now, for those of you balancing work and family life, these factors often go into overdrive. Working moms are more at risk of burnout than working dads and women without children. So, let’s start by understanding how these six factors hit working moms harder than most. Then you’ll get some practical, mom-tested advice on how to tackle each one head-on! Read on to find out how working moms can overcome burnout!
The Six Work Factors That Cause stress at work (And Why They’re Harder for Working moms)
- Control
Ah, control—remember that?! When was the last time you felt in control of anything? For working mums, control over your workday is often laughable. Between a 9 a.m. meeting, a sick kid at home, and the last-minute school project, “control” becomes a myth. In burnout, lack of control at work is a risk factor for burnout. But, for moms you’re much more likely to find it hard to find control at work- and at home. - Reward
Being adequately rewarded for the work you do is protective against burnout. It doesn’t necessarily have to be financial reward here- opportunities for positive feedback, professional development, and doing rewarding work also help protect against burnout. The trouble is that moms work hard both at home and at the office. Whilst the labour at home is rewarding, it’s also unpaid. Your hard work is often unappreciated by your loved ones (or at least, they might not vocalise their gratitude!). When’s the last time someone handed you a trophy for surviving the day? Or a pay raise for juggling ten things at once? For working moms, the feeling of being under-rewarded is magnified because you’re constantly giving without much in return. - Values mismatch
Having a kid, like any major life event, changes what’s important to you. You want to be a present parent, but your boss wants you to be available 24/7. That clash in values—between being a good parent and a good employee—leaves working moms feeling like they’re always failing somewhere. This values mismatch puts working moms at disproportionate burnout risk. - Community
A supportive community means everything when it comes to effective burnout prevention. But- whether it’s your workplace community or your ‘village’ at home, feeling isolated is really common among working moms. You might be surrounded by people, but who really understands your daily challenges? If you don’t have a village, then you’ll be at risk of burnout. - Fairness
If you’re not treated fairly at work by your employer, then the stress it causes can factor into the development of burnout. But the workplace isn’t just the only place where moms feel unfairly treated. Ever notice how you’re doing the same work as everyone else but with added mental load? “Fair” can feel like a foreign concept when you’re balancing unpaid household labor on top of your job. (click here to read more about how women take on more of the domestic load, and how it can cause burnout). - Workload
Oh boy, where do we even start? Your workload is like an all-you-can-eat buffet that just never ends, with side orders of school pick-ups, laundry, and dinner-making. Not only does a heavy workload in your job risk burnout, for working moms, the workload both at home and at work can feel an impossible juggle.
Tackling These Factors: Practical, Real-World Solutions for Working moms to overcome burnout
1. Control: how to regain it (yes, really!)
As a working mom, you can’t control everything, but you can focus on the little things. Control doesn’t have to mean re-organizing your entire life—it can be as simple as setting small boundaries. Here’s the cool thing about control in burnout prevention: simply believing you have control over your work and life is enough to prevent burnout (this is because those that believe this then go on to make changes that reduce burnout!).
Three things you can do:
- Time blocking: Allocate specific time slots for work, family, and you. And yes, that you time is mandatory.
- Delegate at work and home: Get comfortable with asking for help, whether it’s a team member at work or your partner at home. This is tough but essential to get a handle on your stress levels.
- Say no more often: Boundaries are your best friend. Practice saying no to those extra requests that push you to the limit. It’s a form of self-care!
2. Reward: finding it where you can
If you’re not getting rewards from your boss (hello, pay gap), it’s time to create your own sense of accomplishment.
Three things you can do:
- Celebrate your wins: Small victories deserve recognition. Did you manage to cook dinner AND make that deadline? Treat yourself to your favorite snack or a 30-minute Netflix binge.
- Find meaning in your work: If possible, focus on the tasks that make you feel good. Even if it’s just 20% of your day, doing something that energizes you makes a big difference.
- Create mini-rewards: Set small goals and reward yourself. Finished the laundry pile? Take a bubble bath. Got through your inbox? Have a dance party with your kids.
3. Values mismatch: making it work
When your personal values don’t align with your workplace, it can feel like an uphill battle. But instead of switching jobs, try creating alignment where you can. If you’re not sure what your values are, start with this list here.
Three things you can do:
- Find overlap: Identify the common ground between your values and your job. If you value flexibility, negotiate for it—maybe not today, but it’s worth a try!
- Be vocal: Don’t be afraid to communicate your needs and values to your employer. Sometimes, it takes a conversation to shift expectations.
- Own your personal mission: Whether at work or home, make your values clear to yourself and others. Even if it’s just saying, “I prioritize family dinners,” own it unapologetically. Remember, you don’t need to explain your priorities to anyone else.
4. Community: building your village
You need your people—both at work and at home. Building a community that understands the struggle can take some work, but please do prioritise this. It will make such a difference to how you feel about your work and life.
Three things you can do:
- Join a values- aligned mom group: Whether online or in-person, find a group of moms who get it. Sharing struggles and wins can make a world of difference. Just make sure that the group you’re going to join shares your values. If you’re ruthlessly practical then you won’t find the support you need in a crunchy mama group!
- Leverage work relationships: If possible, form a support system at work with colleagues who also juggle similar responsibilities.
- Outsource help: It’s okay to get help where you can, whether it’s a cleaner, babysitter, or meal delivery service. You can’t do it all, and that’s okay.
5. Fairness: level the playing field
Let’s face it, working moms often take on more than their fair share. Tackling fairness starts with acknowledging the imbalance and taking steps to fix it. Just FYI, the advice below is optional. Tackling an unfair work culture is tough when you’re already stressed and feeling vulnerable. You don’t have to take on more if you don’t want to.
Three things you can do:
- Speak up: Advocate for fairness at work and at home. If you’re doing more than your share, it’s time to have that tough conversation—whether with your boss or your family.
- Track your time: Keep a log of how much time you spend on work vs. household tasks. This can help you (and others) see where the imbalance lies.
- Outsource when possible: Yes, we’re back to outsourcing. Whether it’s hiring someone to help with household chores or delegating more at work, reducing your load can help create fairness.
6. Workload: simplifying the chaos
When you’re juggling ten balls at once, it’s no wonder burnout hits hard. Reducing your workload might sound impossible, but there are ways to make it more manageable.
Three things you can do:
- Prioritize ruthlessly: What’s urgent, and what can wait? Learn to be okay with letting the non-essential tasks slide. Read this post on how you can use my reworked Mom version of the Eisenhower Matrix!
- Batch tasks: Group similar tasks together to make them more efficient. This works for both work and home—think meal prepping or knocking out emails in one go.
- Take breaks: I know, breaks feel like a luxury, but they’re crucial. Set a timer for 5-minute breathers during your workday and resist the urge to fill that time with something “productive.” Make a lovely coffee and savor it. Or, perhaps you could take a moment to get some fresh air? It all adds up.
Final Thoughts for working moms to overcome burnout
Working moms face burnout on a whole different level! But, with some self-awareness and practical steps, you can start taking control (yes, even if it’s just a little) and feel more in charge of your life again. Remember, you’re already doing an amazing job. So here’s to keeping it real, staying strong, and giving yourself a little more grace every day! You’ve absolutely got this.
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