Struggling with fertility issues is emotionally exhausting enough without the added stress of navigating it in the workplace. Women, men, non-binary folks and LGBTQIA+ couples who are dealing with fertility problems often face unique challenges at work. Many of these challenges make your journey even more difficult. In addition, not only do these challenges increase stress, but they also make burnout more likely.
If you think you might be burning out, then this quiz will help you to this out- and tell you your essential next steps.
Let’s break down the key issues that those with fertility problems face in the workplace and, crucially, how you can tackle each one in a way that’s practical for work, and compassionate for you.
10 Challenges for folks with Fertility Problems at work (and Why They Increase Stress)
- Lack of flexibility for medical appointments
Fertility treatments often require frequent, time-sensitive medical appointments. Without workplace flexibility, you may struggle to fit these appointments into your schedule. This then leads to stress and worry about job security (see case study on Action for Children). - Unsupportive work cultures
Many workplaces don’t have policies in place to support employees dealing with fertility issues. This can lead to you feeling isolated or guilty for needing time off. - Fear of discrimination
You may fear that disclosing fertility struggles could result in discrimination or missed career opportunities. This then leads to additional stress and pressure to keep your issues hidden. - Mental and emotional strain
Fertility problems can be emotionally draining, affecting concentration, productivity, and overall mental well-being at work. Many people feel pressured to perform at their usual level, despite the emotional toll. You bring your whole self to work- it’s impossible to leave your fertility struggles at the work front door. - High cost of fertility treatments
For those paying out of pocket, fertility treatments can be financially crippling, adding a significant burden on top of the stresses of work. This financial strain increases burnout risk as you juggle both expenses and workplace demands. - Lack of access to benefits
While some companies offer fertility treatment coverage, it’s not the norm. Employees without such benefits feel unsupported, especially when their workplace provides no guidance or assistance with accessing fertility resources. (FYI- The F Word At Work podcast has some great advice for busy HR, DE&I and wellbeing leads to support their employees with fertility issues). - Stigma around fertility struggles
Talking openly about fertility issues is still taboo in many workplaces, leaving you to suffer in silence. The stigma can stop you from seeking support or requesting necessary accommodations. - The pressure of time
Fertility treatments are often a race against time. The pressure to balance work responsibilities with this ticking clock can be overwhelming. This stress amplifies when treatments are unsuccessful, as they often are- IVF success rates range from 32% for women under the age of 35, to 4% for women aged over 44. - Colleagues’ unawareness and insensitive comments
Fertility struggles are invisible, and colleagues may unknowingly make insensitive comments about parenthood, adding to emotional strain. “When are you going to have a baby?” can feel like salt in the wound when you’re going through fertility investigation and treatment. - Fear of job insecurity
You are likely to worry that taking time off for fertility treatments will be seen as a lack of commitment to their job, especially if your workplace lacks clear policies around this issue. This fear can lead to burnout as you push yourself to keep up.
How These Issues Lead to Burnout
Fertility problems are a deeply personal and emotional challenge. When layered with the additional pressures of work, they create a perfect storm for burnout. The constant balancing act between attending medical appointments, managing the emotional rollercoaster of treatments, and performing at work can leave you feeling depleted and overwhelmed.
Burnout is the result of chronic stress. When work becomes another arena where fertility struggles must be managed in silence, the emotional toll can become too much to bear. Without support, you might find yourself battling feelings of shame, fear, and inadequacy—leading to both mental and physical exhaustion.
Let’s move on to think about practical solutions to help!
10 Practical Solutions to Help Navigate Fertility Issues at Work
- Flexible work arrangements
If possible, request a flexible work schedule that allows time for medical appointments without penalizing your productivity. This could include flex-time, remote work, or making up hours later in the week. - Confidential conversations with HR
Consider having a confidential conversation with HR to explore what options and accommodations are available to you. Many companies have policies around medical leave that you may not be aware of. - Utilize Employee Assistance Programs (EAPs)
Some workplaces offer Employee Assistance Programs that provide confidential counseling, including mental health support for fertility-related stress. Take advantage of these resources if they’re available. - Request a reduced workload
If your job allows, consider asking for a reduced workload or temporary job-share arrangement during periods of intensive treatment. This can help manage your stress while maintaining your professional responsibilities. Your occupational health department (if you have one) will be able to help with this. - Access to fertility benefits
Check with your HR department to see if your company offers fertility treatment coverage or wellness benefits. If not, inquire about external resources or advocacy groups that might provide assistance. - Join a support network
Whether online or in person, joining a fertility support group can be a game-changer. Knowing you’re not alone and sharing your experiences with others in the same boat can make a huge difference. But, use these resources with care. If you find the distress of others too much, or if seeing others celebrate their pregnancies cuts too deeply, be prepared to step away. - Create boundaries around work stress
Fertility struggles are all-consuming, and burnout happens faster when you’re pushing yourself to be perfect at work. Set boundaries by letting go of tasks that are non-essential or requesting extensions on deadlines. - Educate your boss without oversharing
You don’t need to disclose all the details, but it’s okay to let your manager know that you’re dealing with a medical issue that requires flexibility. A simple heads-up can pave the way for a more understanding and supportive work environment. See below for a suggested email template that you can copy and paste to send to your boss. - Prioritise rest and recovery
Fertility treatments can be emotionally and physically exhausting, so it’s important to factor in rest and recovery where possible . Instead of pushing through non-stop, try scheduling moments of downtime during your work day. Whether that’s taking a short walk, doing a quick mindfulness exercise, or allowing yourself a proper lunch break. These small moments of rest can help prevent burnout and maintain your emotional well-being, without needing to take extended time off. - Focus on self-care outside of work
Your journey doesn’t stop when you leave the office. Prioritize self-care practices that help reduce stress, like meditation, therapy, or simply taking time to rest and relax.
Email Outline for Requesting Time Off for Fertility Appointments
Here’s an outline of how you can draft an email to your boss when requesting time off for medical appointments related to fertility treatments. Feel free to copy and paste with your edits as you see fit:
Subject: Request for Flexible Time Off for Medical Appointments
Dear [Boss’s Name],
I hope this email finds you well. I’m writing to let you know that I’m currently undergoing medical treatment that requires several upcoming appointments, and I will need some flexibility in my schedule to attend these. The times and dates required for these appointments are:
[list dates, if known]
I am fully committed to meeting my work responsibilities and will ensure that any missed time is made up accordingly. If needed, I’d be happy to discuss how we can best manage this during the treatment period.
Thank you for your understanding and support. Please let me know if you’d like to discuss this further.
Kind regards,
[Your Name]
Final Thoughts on successfully navigating fertility problems at work
Navigating fertility struggles is hard enough without the additional weight of workplace stress. But, by creating a plan that includes practical solutions and healthy boundaries, you can reduce the chances of burnout and take better care of yourself. Everyone’s journey is different, but you don’t have to walk it alone. Seek support, set boundaries, and remember that your well-being matters just as much as your work performance.