Being a working mom is no small feat, and when you add self-employment to the mix, life can feel like a constant juggling act. On one hand, self-employed moms enjoy greater flexibility, the ability to create their schedules, and the possibility of escaping the corporate world’s rigidity. On the other hand, self-employed working moms face unique challenges that can increase stress levels, especially when trying to balance work time, family life, and personal health. Moms often turn to self-employment to help ease burnout after struggling to balance the simultaneous demands of parenting and work.
is self-employment the cause or the cure for burnout in working moms?
It’s complicated:
The answer is that self-employment is both a cause of burnout, and the cure for it.
Whether self-employment is good or bad for your burnout risk is entirely dependent on your personal circumstances.
In this post, we’ll explore why self-employed working moms are particularly vulnerable to stress and burnout, and then uncover strategies to manage these pressures effectively. But, we’ll also dive into how self-employment can (paradoxically) also help moms recover from burnout and live a more balanced life.
Stuck in a job that’s burning you out and wondering if going self employed will help? By the end, you’ll have a clearer idea of whether self-employment is the right choice for you.
About the author:
Dr Claire is a burnout expert and mom of 2. Her book first book, The Burnout Doctor, is being published in January 2025. Pre-order your copy now!
The double-edged sword of self-employment for working moms
Why self-employment can increase stress levels
Let’s begin by talking about how being self-employed can increase stress levels for working moms. While being a self-employed mom comes with exciting benefits like greater flexibility and autonomy, it’s important to recognize the stressors that often accompany it:
- Financial uncertainty
Self-employed individuals don’t have the steady paycheck of a full-time job. Add to that the pressure of covering expenses like child care, health insurance, and short-term disability insurance without employer support, and the stress can quickly mount. For working moms managing household budgets, the lack of a predictable income can be a major source of anxiety. - Blurring boundaries between work and personal life
Without a corporate structure or “official” work time, self-employed moms often work during family moments, school holidays, or even evening hours. A little corner office in the home might lack the separation needed to maintain a healthy work-life balance, leaving moms feeling they’re neither fully present at work nor home. - Increased mental load
Managing every aspect of your business—from accounting during tax time to building social media accounts—adds significant pressure. For working moms already responsible for the bulk of parental leave logistics, school pick-ups, and a seemingly endless to-do list, the additional business running can tip the scales toward burnout. - Lack of support systems
Self-employed people miss out on many corporate benefits, such as paid leave programs, employer-provided health insurance, and even coworkers to commiserate with. Self-employed mothers may feel isolated compared to their counterparts in the labor force.
Here’s an example to demonstrate how self employment can increase stress and burnout:
Example 1: Stress levels raised by self-employment
Name: Sarah
Job: Freelance graphic designer
Family and home setup: Sarah is a single mom of two young kids, aged 4 and 7, living in a small apartment in New York. She has no local family support and relies on paid child care. Her budget is tight, and her biggest concern is ensuring she has enough money to cover rent, child care, and health insurance.
Why self-employment increases her stress:
- Financial instability: Sarah’s freelance income fluctuates dramatically from month to month, and she struggles to keep up with expenses.
- Overwhelming workload: Since she has to manage all aspects of her business, including finding clients, invoicing, and marketing, her to-do list feels never-ending.
- Blurred boundaries: With her kids home during school holidays and limited space for a dedicated home office, Sarah finds it challenging to focus on her work.
- Isolation: As a self-employed individual, Sarah doesn’t have coworkers to lean on, leaving her feeling unsupported and alone in her challenges.
For Sarah, the financial and logistical demands of self-employment outweigh the benefits of flexibility, leaving her feeling more stressed than she was in her previous full-time job. Her stress levels are raised, and she is at risk of burnout. Here are some ideas to help her avoid burnout that would help any self-employed working. mom:
Practical strategies for managing stress and burnout when self-employed
Thankfully, self-employed moms don’t have to succumb to burnout. Here’s how to stay in the right mind zone and manage stress effectively:
- Set clear boundaries
Create a ‘home-free’ work area or dedicated workspace to minimize distractions and separate work from family life. - Prioritize self-care
Schedule non-negotiable breaks for enough sleep, exercise, and quality time with loved ones. Organizing an achievable, doable list of priority items helps make room for these essential moments. - Build a support network
Whether through professional associations, nonprofit organizations, or other self-employed women, lean on a community for advice and support. - Delegate where possible
Outsource smaller pieces of your workload, such as hiring a freelance writer for marketing tasks or a project manager for administrative work. - Stay financially prepared
Create a financial buffer to navigate slower months, and explore private insurer plans for essential benefits like medical leave.
It is possible to manage stress effectively, and avoid burnout as a self-employed working mom.
However, whilst being self-employed can be very stressful for working moms (and could even lead to burnout), it can also help prevent burnout.
The paradox of self-employment: stressor and savior
Surprisingly, self-employment can also be a solution for working moms to recover from burnout. While it presents challenges, it offers something that many stressed moms desperately need: control over their lives.
Why self-employment can help reduce stress
- Greater flexibility
The ability to create your schedule means you can attend to family priorities like maternity leave or school holidays without asking for permission or sacrificing income. - More meaningful work
Many moms find that running their businesses aligns with their passions, giving them a sense of purpose missing in the corporate world. - Freedom from the “motherhood penalty”
Self-employed moms escape the subtle (and sometimes overt) biases that working mothers face in the traditional labor market. - Customizable workload
Unlike a rigid full-time job, self-employment allows moms to work part-time, in smaller pieces, or during hours that suit their family life.
But what about you? How do you know if self employment is the right chose for your stress levels as a working mother? Take the quiz to find out!
Quiz: Will self-employment ease your stress?
Take this short quiz to see if self-employment might help you reduce stress:
1. Do you feel that your current job allows you enough time for family priorities?
- Yes / No
2. Do you feel emotionally drained at the end of your workday?
- Yes / No
3. Do you thrive on independence and decision-making?
- Yes / No
4. Are you financially prepared to handle unpredictable income for at least six months?
- Yes / No
5. Do you have access to child care or a supportive partner/family?
- Yes / No
If you answered “No” to questions 1 and 4, but “Yes” to 3, self-employment might be a good idea for reducing your stress.
How self-employment can help manage stress levels
Self-employment offers unique benefits that can directly address some of the root causes of stress and burnout for working moms. Here’s how it can help:
- Control over your schedule
- Benefit: Self-employed moms have the power to set thwie hours, allowing them to work during their most productive times or fit work around family responsibilities.
- Why it works (science backed!): Autonomy in scheduling significantly reduces work-related stress.
- Alignment with personal values
- Benefit: Running your own business allows you to pursue projects that align with your passions and goals.
- Why it works (science backed!): When work feels meaningful, it becomes less draining and more fulfilling. This emotional alignment can help stave off burnout.
- Avoiding the corporate “motherhood penalty”
- Benefit: Self-employed mothers sidestep biases against working moms, such as being overlooked for promotions or assignments.
- Why it works: Eliminating the psychological toll of workplace discrimination creates a healthier mental space.
- Opportunity for better work-life balance
- Benefit: Self-employment allows you to integrate work into family life more seamlessly. For example, you can take breaks for school events or personal milestones.
- Why it works: Flexibility means you’re more likely to meet your own needs and those of your family without the constant tug-of-war between roles.
- Scalable workload
- Benefit: Self-employed individuals can tailor the amount of work they take on, scaling it up or down based on life circumstances.
- Why it works: The ability to lighten your load during high-stress periods (like a new baby or school holidays) can prevent overwhelm.
As you can see, self employment can both help and cause burnout- but whether it’s the right choice for you is entirely dependent on your personal circumstances.
Practical advice: Is self-employment better for your stress levels?
Transitioning to self-employment isn’t a cure-all for stress, but it can offer solutions to specific challenges. Use these steps to determine if it’s the right move for you:
- Identify your stress triggers
- Write down what’s causing the most stress in your current role: lack of flexibility, long hours, an unsupportive work environment, or financial instability.
- Compare your needs with self-employment benefits
- If your stressors revolve around a rigid schedule or a lack of autonomy, self-employment might be a great fit. However, if you thrive on structured environments or struggle with financial uncertainty, self-employment might increase your stress.
- Evaluate your support system
- Do you have access to reliable child care or support from a partner? Self-employment works best when there’s a foundation of support for unexpected challenges.
- Test your adaptability
- Consider how comfortable you are with uncertainty. Can you handle variable income and unforeseen work challenges without feeling overwhelmed?
- Seek advice from self-employed moms
- Talk to other self-employed women in similar life stages. Their experiences can provide valuable insights into the day-to-day realities of balancing motherhood and business ownership.
By thoughtfully weighing these factors, you can make a well-informed decision that aligns with your unique situation. Here’s an example to help you work this out:
Example 2: Stress levels decreased by self-employment
Name: Emily
Job: Boutique owner and part-time freelance writer
Family and home setup: Emily lives in a suburban home in New Jersey with her spouse and three kids, ages 2, 5, and 10. Her partner has a stable full-time job with benefits, and they share parenting duties. Emily’s mother also lives nearby and helps with child care.
Why self-employment decreases her stress:
- Flexible schedule: Emily can schedule work during school hours and nap times, leaving her evenings free for family dinners and personal life.
- Aligned priorities: Emily loves the creative freedom of running her boutique and writing about topics she’s passionate about.
- Shared responsibilities: Her spouse’s steady income provides peace of mind, reducing the pressure to generate a significant income every month.
- Better work-life balance: Emily has created a well-organized schedule that allows her to attend school events and take personal days when needed.
For Emily, self-employment is an empowering choice that allows her to create a harmonious balance between her work, family, and personal goals.
If you’re still a little stuck about whether self-employment will help your stress levels then these journal prompts will allow for some deeper reflection.
Journal questions for self-reflection
- What are my primary sources of stress in my current job?
- Is it financial pressure, time constraints, lack of flexibility, or something else?
- What aspects of my life would I like to improve through self-employment?
- More time with family, greater autonomy, or the ability to pursue work I’m passionate about?
- Do I have the financial stability to handle the unpredictability of self-employment?
- If not, what steps can I take to build a safety net?
- How much support do I have at home?
- Can my partner, family, or childcare providers help with parenting or household tasks?
- Am I comfortable with multitasking and handling multiple roles (e.g., business owner, marketer, accountant)?
- If not, could outsourcing or seeking professional help ease this burden?
- How do I feel about working alone?
- Would I miss the camaraderie of coworkers, or do I thrive in independent environments?
- What steps can I take to test self-employment before fully committing?
- Could I start a side hustle or reduce hours in my current job to experiment with being my own boss?
- What values or priorities matter most to me?
- Do I value financial security over flexibility, or is pursuing meaningful work more important than a predictable income?
Final thoughts
Self-employment is not a one-size-fits-all solution. For some working moms, it can intensify stress and burnout, but for others, it can be the key to greater flexibility and life satisfaction. By carefully weighing the pros and cons, using tools like this quiz, and following practical advice, you can determine if becoming your own boss by running your own business or going self-employed is a good idea for your unique circumstances and your mental health.
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