Here is all the career advice that working moms should never take.
The majority of the bad career advice given generally comes from a good place and is well intentioned. But, so many people don’t understand just how challenging it is to be a working mom.
The unfortunate truth is that working moms can’t have it all. And, if you try to have it all eventually something has to give. Sadly, this normally ends up being your mental health. Working moms are more at risk of burnout than men (regardless of their parental status), and women that aren’t parents. If you are worried that you might be burning out then please do this quiz and follow the next step advice to start to feel better immediately.
When you become a working mom, it feels like the entire career advice rulebook gets thrown out the window. Suddenly, the things that were simple before—networking, career growth, balancing work and life—seem like they were written for someone who has endless time and zero dependents. So, let’s dive into ten pieces of classic career advice, why they don’t work for moms, and what to do instead.
Warning: I’m sprinkling this with some real talk!
Career advice that working moms should never take: the top 10 pieces of classic career advice (and what to do instead)
1. “Just work harder.” (aka hustle culture)
Why it doesn’t work: Ah, yes, hustle culture. As if you’re not already juggling work deadlines, school pick-ups, and remembering which kid needs to bring in a cake for the school sale tomorrow. For moms, “hustling” harder simply just means “more stress”. There’s only so much you can run on coffee and nerves alone.
What to do instead: Don’t do more, do less—strategically. Focus on a few key work tasks that have the highest impact, and then be ruthless about your boundaries. Outsource or delegate where possible (yes, even housework counts).
To help you identify which tasks to leave, and which to delegate, then the Eisenhower Matrix is a super helpful too to help you! You can read more about how you can use the Eisenhower Matrix to tackle your to-do list here.
(side note: I really think that the Eisenhower Matrix is well overdue a working mom makeover. Watch this space!)
2. “You need to be available 24/7 to succeed.”
Why it doesn’t work: You’re already available 24/7—to your kids. The thought of also being available to your job, colleagues, and clients at all hours is enough to make you cry into your third cup of cold tea.
What to do instead: Lean into your boundaries. Set clear working hours, communicate them, and stick to them like they’re written in stone. Set these expectations early too —both for your employer and your family. You’ll earn respect by being firm about your time, and, surprisingly, things will still get done even if you’re not always on call.
3. “Network, network, network!”
Why it doesn’t work: Yes, let’s just pop off to a networking event after a full day of work- when in reality you need to sprint to nursery to pick up your toddler up last (again). Sure, that’s easy!
What to do instead: Use your time wisely. Instead of traditional networking events, leverage online platforms like LinkedIn. Send a meaningful message to a connection while melting at their swimming lessons, or join a relevant Facebook group where you can participate on your own time. Networking doesn’t have to mean cocktail hours—it can happen from your sofa while your kids watch cartoons (also- screen time is fine. Do whatever it takes!).
4. “Just say yes to every opportunity!”
Why it doesn’t work: Saying “yes” to everything when you’re a mom is like willingly walking into quicksand. There’s only so much “yes” to go around before you feel overwhelmed, overcommitted, and burned out.
What to do instead: Channel your inner toddler and learn the power of “no.” Politely decline opportunities that don’t align with your goals or values. And when you do say yes, make sure it’s to something that genuinely excites you or furthers your career in a way that’s worth your limited energy. It’s about being strategic about what you say yes to!
Halfway through! Keep reading to learn classic career advice for working moms that you should never take
5. “You just need to be more productive.”
Why it doesn’t work: The old “be more productive” mantra, as if you’re a factory churning out mountains of plastic tat. The truth is, when you’re balancing the emotional, mental, and physical load of both work and family, there are days when just surviving feels like an accomplishment.
What to do instead: Redefine productivity. It’s not about doing more in less time—it’s about doing the right things in the time you have. Focus on three key tasks a day. If you nail those, you’re winning, even if the laundry remains a monument to your procrastination (as mine does!!)
6. “You need to climb the corporate ladder.”
Why it doesn’t work: Climbing a ladder requires two hands and two feet. Let’s be real, for you one hand is usually holding a baby, and the other is answering work emails whilst simultaneously trying to drink a cold coffee and shovel a late lunch into your mouth.
What to do instead: Forget the ladder. Focus on building a career lattice instead—a flexible, non-linear path that allows you to shift horizontally, take breaks, or even step back when needed. Career progression doesn’t have to be a straight line, especially when you’re navigating the beautifully messy world of motherhood.
7. “Stay late at the office to show you’re committed.”
Why it doesn’t work: Staying late is a no-go when you have a daycare pick-up deadline that’s more rigid than the Queen’s Guard. Commitment has been treated the same as visibility for far too long.
What to do instead: Work smart, not long. Use your time at work wisely and avoid the office “stay late” trap. Deliver results within your working hours, and if possible, explore flexible working arrangements. Commitment isn’t measured by hours, it’s measured by impact. At least, it should be. If your employer isn’t being sensitive to your new normal, it might be time to look for a job elsewhere.
8. “You should always aim for a promotion.”
Why it doesn’t work: Promotions often come with more responsibility, longer hours, and more stress. For many mums, the goal isn’t always about climbing higher—it’s about finding balance and keeping everything (mostly) intact.
What to do instead: Redefine what “success” means to you. After having kids what success means to you will almost inevitably change. You might still want to climb the ladder- in which case, go for it! For others, it’s about creating a sustainable work-life rhythm that allows for career fulfilment and family time. Aim for roles that align with your values and offer the flexibility you need.
9. “Make your personal life secondary to your career.”
Why it doesn’t work: For working moms, the personal and professional are forever intertwined. No one lives in a vacuum, and there are days when your kid’s school play is more important than a client presentation. And that’s OK.
What to do instead: Embrace integration over separation. Let go of the idea that your personal and professional lives are in competition. Some days your career will take the spotlight, other days it’ll be your family, and that’s perfectly fine. Balance is a moving target. Also- it’s ok to not be be achieving 100% in every single aspect of your life.
10. “Never take a break or gap in your career.”
Why it doesn’t work: Life doesn’t always unfold the way you hoped, or planned. Whether it’s for maternity leave, caregiving, or mental health, there are times when a break is necessary, not a career killer.
What to do instead: Take the break if you need it. Be kind to yourself. So many women have returned from career breaks stronger, more focused, and with a clearer sense of purpose. You can always pick up where you left off, and there’s no shame in pausing to recalibrate.
Traditional career advice just wasn’t built with the complexities of working motherhood in mind. And, while some of it might seem helpful in theory, it often falls flat in the face of real-life responsibilities. But, don’t despair—you’re doing an incredible job. By reworking the rules to fit your life, you’ll find your own path to success, fulfilment, and maybe even a little bit of peace.
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