Here’s why you need to be aware of the ADHD burnout cycle. There is a new generation – particularly of adult women – being diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). These women typically have not been diagnosed in early life because they have been able to mask their symptoms sufficiently. Or, perhaps because they presented in a different way than expected.
Many adult women, especially working moms, are receiving ADHD diagnoses later in life. This is a reality that comes as both a revelation and a relief. For years, these women may have struggled through daily life. Meeting work demands, managing family responsibilities, and navigating social interactions, all the while feeling like they’re falling short. Understanding why so many women with ADHD are diagnosed later in life is key. It requires looking at how symptoms manifest differently in females, the societal expectations placed on women, and the challenges associated with “masking” ADHD traits. The result, for many, is burnout, and in particular, rapid ADHD burnout cycles.
Why do ADHD diagnoses come later for women?
ADHD is a neurodevelopmental condition that affects executive functioning, attention, and impulsivity. ADHD has traditionally been studied in boys, and the symptoms associated with it (like hyperactivity and impulsiveness) are often more visible and disruptive. Research shows that ADHD in girls and women often presents differently.
Women are more likely to experience inattentive symptoms like forgetfulness, disorganization, and difficulty focusing on daily tasks. These symptoms can be less obvious and are often mistakenly attributed to personality quirks or stress rather than a neurodevelopmental condition. This gendered misunderstanding of ADHD symptoms is a significant reason why many women go undiagnosed until adulthood.
ADHD in adulthood might look like this:
having difficulty finishing projects once the challenging parts have been done;
having difficulty organizing tasks and getting things in order;
forgetting appointments and obligations;
avoiding or delaying tasks that require a lot of thought;
needing to fidget or do something with the hands or feet when in meetings or having to sit still for long periods;
feeling overly active and compelled to move;
making careless mistakes when working on a tedious or repetitive task or piece of work;
having difficulty concentrating on what people say;
regularly losing items such as keys, wallets or phones;
lack of motivation;
sleep problems;
being distracted by activity and noise;
having difficulty relaxing and unwinding;
sensitive dysphoria;
poor time management;
talking a lot in social situations, interrupting other people, finishing off other people’s sentences;
finding it hard to wait your turn in situations where this is expected or required.
The role of masking and burnout
As adults, many women adapt by “masking” their symptoms. Masking is consciously or unconsciously hiding behaviors and working overtime to meet societal expectations. This masking involves compensatory strategies like working extra hours, hyper-focusing on specific tasks, and maintaining an external appearance of control. While these strategies help women get through the day, they also lead to chronic stress, mental exhaustion, and a cycle of burnout symptoms. Over time, the emotional dysregulation that is often part of ADHD becomes harder to hide. This ultimately leads to emotional exhaustion, frustration, and the need for professional help.
Masking ADHD symptoms isn’t just exhausting; it creates a vicious cycle. Women with undiagnosed ADHD often feel overwhelmed by the unique challenges of daily life, experiencing ADHD burnout symptoms like fatigue, mental fog, and emotional exhaustion. Constantly “keeping it together” for others or working extra hours to stay organized drains cognitive and emotional resources. Over time, this burnout amplifies ADHD symptoms, making it even harder to manage daily tasks.
For working moms, life stressors like balancing work and family responsibilities, managing household schedules, and handling social interactions add layers of stress. Events like a career transition, the birth of a child, or relationship changes can “unmask” ADHD symptoms. These pivotal moments increase the pressure to manage everything flawlessly. It makes it impossible to keep up with the masking behaviors that were once used to cope. The chronic stress of these situations exacerbates emotional dysregulation and ADHD symptoms, pushing women toward a tipping point where they seek a diagnosis.
The link between ADHD and increased burnout risk
Living with undiagnosed ADHD often leads to a cycle of chronic stress and burnout. Women with ADHD tend to internalize their struggles, believing they should be able to manage like everyone else. This self-imposed pressure leads to guilt, emotional exhaustion, and feelings of inadequacy. This only worsens as they struggle to keep up with the demands of daily lives. There is evidence to suggest that ADHD is linked to burnout. This association may be particularly relevant for women who are diagnosed later in life.
ADHD burnout symptoms are particularly challenging for working moms who are already stretched thin. Women with undiagnosed ADHD face higher risks of emotional dysregulation, including mood swings and heightened anxiety. When ADHD is masked or ignored, these symptoms worsen, leading to burnout and impacting physical and mental health. This burnout often compounds feelings of self-blame, adding yet another layer of emotional strain to an already overwhelming experience.
You can see from the list of symptoms above that people with undiagnosed ADHD are likely to struggle with some important aspects of work. In particular, difficulties with time management, organizational skills, and stress management at work lead to a higher rate of burnout in those with ADHD.
Regardless of biological sex or gender, for people with ADHD, burnout is normally caused by unmanaged symptoms. However, workplace stressors (particularly tight deadlines and a heavy workload requiring concentration) and unhealthy coping mechanisms (like avoidance and social withdrawal) are also factors. Masking can be very stressful, too, and certainly can factor into the development of burnout.
What ADHD burnout looks like:
For people with ADHD, especially undiagnosed adults, the burnout cycle is a frequent and challenging experience. In addition, the risk of burnout is much higher in ADHD than in those who are neurotypical. ADHD burnout goes beyond the typical exhaustion. It includes both mental and physical fatigue, emotional dysregulation, and significant challenges in managing daily tasks. The cycle often begins with high levels of motivation and overcommitment, driven by a desire to “prove oneself” or compensate for perceived shortcomings. However, without adequate rest and boundaries, this can lead to periods of extreme fatigue, decreased productivity, and eventually, burnout.
ADHD symptoms make it hard to commit and follow through on work tasks. This then leads to an accumulation of stress and adoption of unhealthy coping techniques (such as avoidance, procrastination, and self-medication). This then leads to withdrawal (quitting, giving up on tasks, and withdrawing socially), before going back to feeling overwhelmed and stressed.
Workplace pressures mean that people with ADHD take significantly more stress-related days off sick than those who do not have ADHD.
Common symptoms in the ADHD burnout cycle include:
- High motivation and overcommitment – This initial phase includes a high drive to take on more responsibilities and projects.
- Accumulating mental and physical exhaustion – The continuous effort leads to fatigue.
- Emotional dysregulation – Symptoms such as anxiety and mood swings start to surface.
- Difficulty with daily tasks – Basic tasks feel overwhelming, leading to procrastination and feelings of being stuck.
- Social withdrawal – Individuals may start avoiding social interactions, and feeling emotionally drained.
- Burnout – Complete exhaustion, both mentally and physically, where managing any responsibility feels unmanageable.
This cycle feeds into itself. Burnout often leads back to the first stage when energy temporarily returns, restarting the process.
How to successfully manage the ADHD burnout cycle
Quite shockingly, there is very little work done on how to successfully manage burnout in ADHD (just three studies known at the time of writing!).
The difficulty with this lack of scientific work and evidence-based advice means that when there is an information vacuum, it gets filled with advice that doesn’t necessarily work or isn’t always helpful.
Work stressors are a factor in the ADHD burnout cycle, but fundamentally the cycle is driven by the ADHD itself. Therefore, concentrating on neurotypical burnout recovery measures alone will not be enough to break the ADHD burnout cycle alone. There are some extra things to be aware of that will need your attention to successfully break the cycle of ADHD burnout.
Managing ADHD symptoms will form a key part of the recovery process. Unmanaged, the symptoms of ADHD can make it very difficult to focus, sit still, and complete tasks on time. Regardless of whether you manage this with medication, therapy, or changes to your routine or work habits, it’s important to reduce the negative impact of these symptoms on your work to help manage burnout.
Procrastination and avoidance can also factor into ADHD burnout because these cause stress by creating a backlog of tasks. Impulsivity can lead to not finishing work tasks and taking on too much. Taking on too many responsibilities and tasks is a common pitfall of people with ADHD, who tend to have a lot of energy, motivation, and optimism about how much they can do. Unfortunately, they may not be realistic with themselves or others about how much they can do or how quickly they can accomplish their goals.
ADHD masking can also be exhausting. Not only does it contribute to ADHD burnout directly in itself, but it can also affect relationships and expectations from employers and co-workers.
With these difficulties in mind, let’s move on to discover 8 proven strategies to help break the recurrent and exhausting cycle of ADHD burnout.
8 powerful strategies to help break the cycle of ADHD burnout:
1. Get a ADHD diagnosis and learn to understand your neurodivergent brain! Depending on where you live, this can be tricky, as waiting lists can be long. But, if your symptoms are significant then having a diagnosis can be a real game changer.
2. Consider ADHD medication – mediation will help to control ADHD control symptoms and minimize their impact on your burnout risk. You don’t need to take medication every day if you don’t want or need to. A lot of people take medication on work, university, or school days when they need to focus or quieten down their brains. Any decision to take medication must be based on understanding the risks and benefits. Please speak to your doctor if you think this would be helpful for you.
3. Access specialist support from an ADHD-trained therapist (CBT or DBT) or ADHD coach – Having the right tools to manage ADHD symptoms outside of medication is really important. Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) are both evidence based in the management of ADHD.
The skills learned with these types of therapy are pretty much everything you need to know to successfully break the ADHD burnout cycle! However, while CBT is recommended to help control ADHD symptoms, not everyone with ADHD feels it is helpful for them. If if this is you then you’re certainly not alone. DBT, or ADHD coaching might be the better approach in this instance.
In the UK, you can access funding for ADHD coaching through the Access to Work program.
4. Get help to learn self-compassion and self-acceptance skills- a very common experience with ADHD burnout is guilt and shame. Learning to treat yourself with kindness through coaching, therapy or a support group is helpful.
6. Unmask your ADHD – masking is exhausting. Let the mask drop. Be honest about your ADHD with yourself and the people around you, and let them help you! It’ll feel a much lighter burden to carry when you do this.
7. Request appropriate reasonable adjustments from your employer, to help ease the impact of your ADHD symptoms on your work life and subsequent stress levels. For instance, open-plan offices can cause sensory overwhelm in ADHD, which then leads to decreased work performance. Your employer would give you reasonable adjustments to help manage this. For instance, you could have the option of having your own office, but if that’s not possible, try noise-canceling headphones instead. Alternatively, your employer could also provide a quiet and private decompression space.
8. Practice mindfulness. Regular mindfulness exercises reduce inattentiveness, hyperactivity, and impulsivity in people with ADHD. Mindfulness also has a secondary benefit in reducing stress and preventing burnout. If meditating isn’t your thing, then doing flow/meditative activities such as yoga and Tai Chi are just as beneficial.
Final thoughts on understanding ADHD burnout: symptoms and recovery
ADHD in women, particularly working moms, comes with unique challenges and stressors that can lead to mental and emotional exhaustion. Undiagnosed ADHD often traps women in a cycle of masking and burnout, intensified by life’s ever-growing demands. But recognizing these challenges is the first step to change. With an accurate diagnosis, professional support, and self-compassion, women can find ways to manage ADHD in daily life, easing the chronic stress that once felt insurmountable. The journey isn’t easy, but with the right support and tools, it’s possible to reclaim balance, joy, and self-acceptance.
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